


For the Love

by LetUsIndulge



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Fake AH Crew, Friends to Lovers, GTA V AU, Getting Together, Getting to Know Each Other, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-10
Updated: 2018-02-22
Packaged: 2019-03-03 02:50:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 20,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13331919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LetUsIndulge/pseuds/LetUsIndulge
Summary: Chad's crew, Screw Attack, get a tip from an anonymous third-party that the Funhaus gang have been acting suspiciously, meeting somewhere each night away from their HQ, and that they're most likely meeting with a rival gang, or some other traitorous activity. It's not reliable in any way, but it wouldn't be smart to ignore it, so Chad plans a stakeout by himself to see if the intel has any ground (which he very much doubts). However, Geoff assigns the Vagabond to come along, the one person Chad had yet to befriend or even talk to, and who he generally feels disconcerted by.-'Two times they kissed because they had to, and one time they kissed because they simply wanted to'





	1. Chapter 1

Chad wasn’t normally made uncomfortable by long silences; however, being in a car with a deathly quiet companion, whom Chad had only interacted with less than a handful of times (each one briefer than the last), turned out to be a little awkward for him. He was very aware of his own movements and didn’t know what to do with his hands or how straight to sit. He tried to focus on the hum of the car’s engine and the muffled noises of the outside, but couldn’t help throwing side glances at the man beside him. The ‘Vagabond’, or Ryan as he was more informally known as to his friends and ‘colleagues’, sat in the driver’s seat with his eyes on the road, face giving away no thoughts or emotions that might be passing through his mind. Though Chad could only assume by his rigid, haughty demeanour that the Vagabond was not at all happy with the current arrangement; having to accompany someone not from his immediate crew on a mission way below his usual standard.

Chad decided to try and soften any hard feelings he might have caused, and apologetically said, “Uh, I’m really sorry about this, I didn’t expect anyone to have to come along with me...” He trailed off, a little nervous at having broken the silence.

“It’s fine.”

And that was all she wrote. No cadence or change of tone, just a flat, short sentence and no change of anything from the other man’s countenance. Chad had to suppress a sigh. It was going to be a long ride.

_30 Minutes Earlier_

Chad stood in the elevator waiting for it to reach the Fake AH crew’s penthouse, honestly a bit unsure of why he had been called there. 

His crew, Screw Attack, had been tipped off that one of their brother gangs, Funhaus, were acting suspicious, apparently fraternising with a rival crew who had been trying to overthrow the ‘Fake AH’ faction for quite a time now. Yet, because of the anonymity of the intel and not wanting to create conflict without evidence, Chad planned to go by himself to follow Funhaus that night and find out if the information he’d been given had any validity to it. He wasn’t a complete idiot though, he made sure to call Geoff to briefly mention the situation, just in case the unlikely happened and he got into some sort of trouble, or the informant actually turned out to be right by some degree. The gang boss ended up asking him to come by the penthouse before he went to Funhaus’s HQ to wait and follow their car (if it left at all). Chad had easily agreed without even asking the reason, assuming that Geoff either wanted another run-down of the lead or wanted to give Chad some gear for the stakeout. 

The elevator dinged and Chad stepped out into the joining hallway that led to the penthouse’s door. He gave it a few, quick knocks and he didn’t have to wait long before it was opened by the gang boss himself.

“Hey Geoff,” Chad greeted immediately with a smile.

Geoff smiled back with a lazy quirk of his lips, “Hey Chad, come in for a second, would ya?”

Chad did so and followed Geoff the couple of steps it took to get to the living room. He was mildly startled to see the Vagabond stood leaning against a wall, the usual black skull mask adorned. Chad gave the same friendly smile he had given to Geoff and the Vagabond nodded vaguely in response; that was normally how their interactions went. In the two years Chad’s crew had partnered up with the Fakes, he had become good friends with each member, however, he hadn’t been able to become anything more than acquaintances with the masked man. The Vagabond was a complete enigma to him though; Chad had seen the Vagabond without his mask before (some missions weren’t mask friendly) and even knew his real name (not that Chad ever dared to use it), but he hadn’t really earned those pieces of information. Chad simply couldn’t get passed the reserved exterior the man seemed to project and it didn’t help that they very rarely worked together, so any opportunities to cross the distance of acquaintances-to-friends were sparse to say the least.

It turned out he would be getting one of those rare chances, though by a less expected cause.

“Ryan’s going with you to tail Funhaus,” Geoff announced, or rather, casually stated.

Chad only faltered in surprise for a second before he began to amicably insist, “Uh, oh, that’s okay; I mean it’s just a small excursion, it’s unlikely anything will happen,” as he looked between Geoff and the Vagabond. He hadn’t wanted to create any fuss or disturbances over his little undertaking and felt guilty that he’d made Geoff feel obligated to help. And, although Chad couldn’t read him, he could only assume that the Vagabond mustn’t have been happy to find out he was the one on babysitting duty. 

Once upon a time, Chad wouldn’t have wanted to work with the Vagabond either, having heard rumours that portrayed the man to kill indiscriminately, even innocents that could be avoided. Chad was no angel himself but he drew the line at killing for the sake of it. It was only when his brother crew, Game Attack, befriended the Fakes that Chad was able to see that those rumours he’d heard were just that, and it wasn’t long after he realised that did he finally accept the offer for Screw Attack to join the Fakes faction. Although, Chad eventually came to understand that those rumours did hold some truths to them; the Vagabond did indeed become almost manic when he was on the more ‘hands-on’ type of jobs and he had zero qualms about killing the people he deemed it necessary (if anything, he seemed to greatly enjoy it). It was kind of spectacular to see.

Geoff gave Chad a fond smile and replied slightly ruefully, “I agree, all the same, I’m not putting my money on ‘unlikelies’, or your head for that matter. At least if two of you go, you can watch each other’s backs.”

Chad nodded in understanding, and smirked resignedly as he glanced back up at the boss leader, “Sooo, buddy system?”

“Buddy system,” The other confirmed, smiling wider.

Chad sighed and turned to the Vagabond with the same smile, “Come on then, buddy.” 

For a moment, Chad thought he saw the Vagabond’s shoulders shake minutely, as if he were laughing. He didn’t have long to confirm it though before Geoff was sending them on their way. 

The two left in one of the cars in the Fakes’ garage; an understated sedan to stay inconspicuous, and the Vagabond took the wheel while Chad recited the time Funhaus were expected to leave to the rendezvous point. The Vagabond had vetoed the mask for this one, it being too much of a familiar trade mark for Funhaus to easily spot and recognise. Even though Chad had seen the man without his mask on before, he wasn’t really used to it and found himself staring a couple of times before remembering himself and turning away.

_Present_

The car had returned to its original silence and Chad decided to focus on the Funhaus’s SUV four vehicles ahead. They had been driving, following Funhaus, for about twenty-five minutes. It was already a little worrying that Funhaus had left their HQ at an accommodating time for the rendezvous point, but when the SUV finally parked close to where the intel said the meeting spot was, Chad was genuinely uneasy. Without a word, the Vagabond pulled up at the end of the street (leaving a good distance so they remained unnoticed) and got out of the sedan, Chad quickly following after him. The two hid behind the wall at the street’s corner where they watched as the Funhaus members hovered by a mouth of an alley-way up ahead.

Chad turned to the Vagabond, “That doesn’t seem good,” he said worriedly, tying to inject a little bit of humour in his tone. 

The Vagabond faced him and looked like he was about to respond, but another voice suddenly interrupted them.

“Chad? Ryan? What are you two doing?”

Chad jumped and spun around to see Bolen, a member of his twin crew, Game Attack. Before either of them realised it, Bolen had looked down the street to see where the two were looking and furrowed his brow at the sight of Funhaus.

“You two spying on Funhaus?” Bolen asked, confusion and concern evident in his voice.

“What? No! We just spotted them, and anyway, what are _you_ doing here?” Chad rambled, faking surprise and slight offence at the accurate accusation, hoping to come off genuine.

He rolled his eyes and easily replied, “Craig and Sam are picking me up from a job. So, if you’re not spying on Funhaus, what exactly _are_ you doing?” He didn’t seem at all convinced by Chad’s protests.

Chad began to panic, finding himself between a rock (in this case, Bolen) and a hard place (Funhaus). He didn’t think it was a good idea to be honest about their motives in case it spread and created tension among the Fake AH affiliates, especially as their suspicions were far from confirmed. However, if he said nothing, he and the Vagabond would look suspicious, and Bolen might suspect them of some form of disloyalty and/or might give them away. He had no way of knowing for sure how Bolen would react to either option and didn’t really want to risk finding out. 

“I didn’t even think you two hung out,” Bolen continued, scrutinizing the two.

Chad had been holding his breath for the last few seconds while he scoured his brain for a possible third option, and he suddenly heard himself say, rushing the words out with a breath, “We’re dating.”

He froze, not quite comprehending what he’d said.

_What?_

Echoing Chad’s thoughts, Bolen flatly said, “What?” His eyes wide and the corners of his mouth turned upwards in confused amusement.

Chad rubbed the back of his head hoping it would come across as embarrassment, instead of the self-loathing he felt.

_Well, better keep digging the hole I made._

“I…Well, we’re dating…but it’s still new and we haven’t told anyone yet…and, uh, then we spotted the Funhaus guys, we kinda panicked and hid…and as luck would have it, you found us instead...” It came out hurried, the words tripping over themselves a couple of times, and Chad’s face felt awfully warm for being outside in the cool evening.

It was such a weak lie, full of holes, and Chad hadn’t looked anywhere at the Vagabond since he’d started speaking; not wanting to see the utter disturbed expression that was most definitely on the other’s face. All he could do was wait for Bolen’s response. 

When the silence stretched on, Chad nervously looked up at Bolen.

Eventually, Bolen incredulously asked, “Are you serious?” looking over to the Vagabond for confirmation. 

“Pretty much,” the Vagabond replied easily and Chad had to hide his shock, having to keep to his role. He shouldn’t have been too surprised really, the Vagabond was known for his calm demeanour and he was good at his job; Chad’s awful excuse wasn’t going to change that. 

Bolen squinted at the two with a humorous, disbelieving grin on his face, “Ha-ha, no, there’s no way. You’re lying,” he scoffed loudly.

“Why would we lie about something like that?” Chad questioned, feigning exasperation. 

Instead of answering, which Chad was kind of grateful for, Bolen just looked at the two with a smug smile and said, “Yeah? Prove it then.”

Perturbed, Chad glanced over at the Vagabond unconsciously before returning his gaze to his friend.

“Wha- ‘prove it’? How?”

He had a horrible feeling where this was going.

“Kiss,” he simply, though still smugly, answered.

 _Ooof course_ , Chad grieved, fighting the urge to slump his head forward with anguish.

“Oh, come on, what are we, in high school?” Chad chided, trying his best to seem nonchalant.

“Whatever, dude, just do it,” Bolen crossed his arms over his chest as he went on, “Or is there something else going on here?”

“We don’t have to pro-” But he stopped talking when the Vagabond suddenly moved in front of him, leaving only a foot or so between them.

Chad stared dumbly at the other for a moment, and then the Vagabond was slowly leaning forward, his blue eyes closing as he did.

_Aaand, this is happening._

He would have been surprised that the Vagabond complied with the act so easily, but with what he did know of the other man, he was the type not to dwell on something like a kiss if it meant getting the job done.

Steeling his nerves the best he could, Chad mirrored the Vagabond’s actions to meet him in the middle, his heart racing with nervous energy.

It was a gentle, yet firm, closed-mouth kiss that lasted three long seconds. Only their lips touched, their arms and hands staying by their sides, but it still felt as intimate as if they were holding onto each other. The heat of Chad’s face seemed to intensify, despite it having been so warm before. 

When they parted, Chad immediately turned his head away, unable to make eye contact with anyone but the floor. There was a part of him that wanted to laugh to release the awkwardness and embarrassment of the situation, but he had to snub that reflex to keep in ‘character’. 

“Oh, uh, sorry, guys, I really thought you were bullshitting me,” Bolen said somewhat flustered, either from embarrassment of seeing the kiss or guilt for making the two prove their ‘relationship’, Chad wasn’t sure. He was smiling though, looking awfully pleased about the sudden ‘development’ between the two and patted Chad on the shoulder on his way past, “Enjoy your date, guys. Oh, and I won’t say anything.”

“T-thanks,” Chad found himself stuttering after him.

Bolen turned around to face the two, walking backwards, to give them a short wave and a smile before he carried on his way forward. The two watched in silence until he was out of sight.

Nervously, Chad glanced at the Vagabond only to find the other already facing him. There was a beat and Chad let out the laughter he had been keeping in all that time; laughing both from awkwardness and the overall absurdity of the situation.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry for causing that, but how in the hell did that work?” He wheezed out, bending over, his hands resting above his knees.

When he heard cheerful, boyish laughter mix with his own, he snapped his head to see the Vagabond openly laughing. It was a laugh that reached his eyes and made the corners of them crinkle. Chad already knew that the Vagabond was a naturally good-looking guy, but when he smiled like that, it was a little overkill.

He found himself turning back to the floor again, his heart suddenly fluttering in his chest, but forced himself to stand upright and smile back at the Vagabond.

“I have no idea, but I’m so glad it did,” The Vagabond chuckled, his laughter dying down.

“Right?” Chad agreed a little over enthusiastically. He was happily astonished that they were talking normally and that the Vagabond didn’t appear to show any contempt of Chad so far, despite having put him in multiple uncomfortable situations. 

The Fake gave another chuckle, before he took a moment to look around the corner to where they had last seen Funhaus.

“Shit, they’re gone,” He cursed, stepping out onto the street.

Chad, disregarding his disappointment at the rare chance of conversing with the other man, quickly rushed over to the alleyway that Funhaus were previously hovering by.

They peeked inside the alley to find it empty.

“Do you think they went down this way?” Chad asked, trying to peer through the darkness down the narrow path.

“I guess there’s only one way to find out,” The Vagabond replied, already taking a step passed the threshold.

They wandered into the dark passage, following a small maze of back-streets, until they reached an exit that led out into a small lane.

Chad was about to step out when the Vagabond took a hold of his arm and gently pulled him back a step. Chad ignored how his heart-rate picked up from the contact; brushing it off as some sort of post-embarrassment or self-consciousness from the kiss, and turned to his companion questioningly. 

The Vagabond gave a soft, “Wait a second,” before he quickly checked around the corner and gestured with a nod of his head, “Look.”

Chad carefully looked down at the end of the narrow lane where he saw the Funhaus crew chatting and laughing, stood outside of a small building; not a house, some sort of establishment Chad couldn’t distinguish.

The two shared a look of ‘what are they doing?’ and continued to watch on.

“Oh,” Was the surprised utterance to the left of them (the opposite side to where they’d been watching Funhaus). The two spun around instantly and Chad saw the Vagabond reach behind him for the waist of his jeans, no doubt where a pistol secretly lay concealed. At the sight of Matt Peake and his usual kind smile though, he withdrew his hand, but his guard wasn’t at all lowered. “Hey guys, what are you two doing here?” He asked in a friendly tone without any sign of suspicion, only slight curiously, but overall seeming generally happy to see them.

Peake was always a quiet guy and, even without really trying, he was almost impossible to hear coming; however, Chad couldn’t really understand how they’d been sneaked up on twice in one day. Chad wondered if maybe he and the Vagabond hadn’t really been taking the job as seriously as they should have been, be it because they really didn’t think Funhaus would betray them or because they unconsciously didn’t want to find out if they were… It was hard to know for sure. Those thoughts deterred him, but he reprimanded himself for his carelessness and resolved himself to be more earnest of the job, that is if they hadn’t already failed.

At the notion of them failing the mission, in some dire way to save the situation, Chad quickly spilled out, “Uh, Hi Matt, we were- uh, well, we saw the others come down this alleyway and we just wanted to see how they were doing but they seem busy- we’re going now,” which did not come out as coherent as he had hoped.

The Vagabond let him finish, a little amusement on his face, before he translated for a confused Matt, ”We followed you guys to say ‘hi’, but it looks like you’re busy.”

“Ah,” Peake laughed lightly with understanding, then said, “I thought the guys might have invited you or something, but you’re welcome to stay.”

“Matt, what are you doing over there?” Chad heard Elyse call out as footsteps approached the alley, and suddenly all of Funhaus were stood in front of the two.

“Hey, what are you guys doing here? Did Matt invite you?” Elyse asked cheerfully as the others expressed similar greetings.

Peake briefly recited what the Vagabond had said before Chad sheepishly followed with, “Yeah, uh, but we’ll leave, you guys were doing stuff, right?”

“What? No, don’t go!” Bruce protested, reassuring the two that they’re welcome.

“You can be our first customers!” Elyse rushed out excitedly.

Adam looked over at his team-mate oddly, though smiling, and laughed, “…But we don’t have anything to give them yet.”

“Ehh, we’ll give them one of the sodas we brought,” James shrugged but gave a childish short laugh at his own half-joke.

The two were quickly ushered into the small establishment, the same one Funhaus had been surrounding prior to them noticing Peake, before they could ask any questions.

“Tah-dahhh,” Laurence sang half-heartedly once they got through the door.

Chad looked around, more confused than before. The place was larger than it appeared from the outside, but maybe it looked bigger because it was practically empty. Well, not ‘empty’ per se, rather, incomplete really. There were paint cans and brushes strewn about in different corners; new, wrapped up furniture (chairs and tables) that had been pushed to one of the far walls; cardboard boxes everywhere; some sort of floor steamer near the door; a long, wooden counter at the back that looked affixed into the floor; as well as other assortment of things.

“What is all this?” Chad asked as he surveyed the space curiously.

“Well…Now, it’s a surprise so you can’t tell anyone but… We’re opening a bar!” Bruce announced with barely contained excitement.

“A bar?” Chad enquired dumbly.

“Yeah, it’s for the entire AH Faction, that’s why we picked such an inconspicuous location,” Bruce carried on, his team-mates having had gone off to unpack the new furniture, except for Elyse who stuck around listening to Bruce.

“We’ve already done the walls and floors,” Elyse told them proudly.

“And it’s only been two weeks since we started,” Bruce added with equal enthusiasm.

Chad was a little stuck with what to say, still trying to process the new information he’d been given. Luckily, the Vagabond took that moment to involve himself in the conversation.

“So you’ve been coming here…everyday?” The Fake casually questioned.

“Yup,” Bruce confirmed, smiling widely.

Chad had to hold in a sigh, _Guess that’s what the informant found so suspicious_.

After getting over the initial astonishment and relief, and not wanting Bruce to think of his silence as him being uninterested or disapproving, Chad was finally able to express his excitement for the other crew’s new venture.

“This is awesome,” He beamed, taken a few more steps further into the large space.

His open positivity towards the idea seemed to amp up Bruce’s already buzzing demeanour, and he quickly dived into more details, “There’s an upstairs too, but for now we’re just using that for storage.”

Elyse had disappeared at some point along with the others, while Bruce continued to tell the pair more of their plans. She eventually returned with two cans of coke, handing them over to the guys, before gesturing for them to sit at a table that Laurence had just finished setting up.

Chad looked at the table but didn’t move as he said, “We’ll help,” feeling uncomfortable sitting as the others worked.

“No, no, you drink!” Elyse insisted, “You’re our customers!”

The sheer excitement in her voice made any more protests die in his throat and he let himself be ushered over to the table.

“You’re a rare pair,” Laurence commented as the two were corralled into the new, pristine seats.

“Yeah, I didn’t know you were friends,” Bruce agreed good-naturedly.

“Uh, it’s a recent thing,” Chad considered with a slightly crooked smile.

After a few more shared words, the Funhaus crew continued unpacking the new furniture and setting them up, leaving the two ‘customers’ to themselves.

Chad held the can of coke loosely in his hands, his elbows and forearms resting on the table, as he thought over the conclusion of the day’s events.

It appeared that the informant, although not completely derived of some correct details, had grossly mistaken the motive behind Funhaus’ recent peculiar activity. And, even though he expected no less of Funhaus, Chad was still relieved to find that the nefarious actions the informant had suspected of the crew had been spectacularly disproved.

Chad lifted his arms to rub his eyes with the palms of his hands, a chuckle erupting from his throat as he did so.

“Oh god,” He sighed, moving one hand back to his coke while the other held his head up.

The Vagabond appeared to agree with the sentiment, amusement on his face as he said, “Today has been…odd.”

Chad laughed, “That’s a reasonable way to describe it,” Looking at the man across from him who laughed in return.

There was a brief pause as the Vagabond pulled out his phone to send Geoff a message to update him on the situation. Chad popped open his coke and took a swing as he looked around the place. He was a little astonished that he and the Vagabond were able to have an amicable conversation; nevertheless, the feeling of worry that the Vagabond disliked him and that he found the whole mission to be an unnecessary annoyance had not relented.

So, when the other man put his phone away, he couldn’t stop himself from making another attempt to lessen his guilt for wasting the man’s time.

“I’m, uh, really sorry that you had to come with me today, and for something that turned out to be nothing,” He spoke a little ruefully, with a sheepish smile, focusing on the can in his hand.

“Well, the only way of knowing that that something was nothing was by investigating, and even though none of us really expected Funhaus to have gone rogue, it was still important to be sure,” He reasoned in a casual tone, before he shrugged as he continued, “Besides, I really didn’t mind coming along, so stop apologising,” He finished with a kind sort of smirk.

Chad smiled back gratefully. “Thanks. I, uh, kinda figured you were mad,” he laughed sheepishly.

The Vagabond chuckled, “Ah, I’ve been told I have that kind of disposition.” He almost sounded proud.

Chad grinned and told his companion, “You were so quiet, I thought you were seething.”

Shaking his head a little, smiling, he said, “Nah, I just didn’t know what to say. As people keep reminding us, we don’t really hang out.”

Chad felt relief from those words; the worry dissipating, though not completely, from where it had clung to his abdomen.

“From a lack of opportunity, not a lack of wanting to,” He quickly reassured while hoping the other felt similarly.

The Fake AH member grinned appreciatively and Chad’s chest strangely constricted a little at the sight of it, to which he conveniently ignored.

“True. I guess, thanks to a questionable tip, now we get one,” He smirked.

Chad laughed a little as he thoughtlessly joked, “Yep, and we jumped right into kissing,” before an instant sinking feeling fell through his stomach as he processed his own words. He had no idea what part of him thought bringing that up was a good idea; he had originally planned on never mentioning it and burying it the sand. Maybe because it was the usual type of humour he’d use with his friends that his brain thought of it as an acceptable thing to say at the time, and his cursed his lack of brain-to-mouth filter.

However, he was surprised when the Vagabond instantly laughed and easily replied, “Think we might have screwed up the normal protocol of getting to know each other, but hey, that was a good kiss.”

Chad smiled wildly at the response and his heart jumped in his chest. His face became warm for the umpteenth time that evening as he laughed gleefully.

“I’m not gonna lie, that was a really good kiss,” He admitted, too quickly to stop himself, but he covered his embarrassment with more laughter, which appeared to work as the Vagabond chuckled along with him.

Chad, as self-conscious as he felt, couldn’t look away whenever the other man smiled or laughed; before that evening, he had only seen the guy straight faced or in ‘work mode’, he was glad that he was able to see other expressions now.

As their laughter died down Chad took another drink of his coke while pretending to be calm, and not desperately scrambling his brain for another topic. In his panic, not knowing the other man well enough to know what he would find interesting to talk about, all he could come up with was the topic of work.

“So, this was probably one of your tamer jobs, huh?” Chad asked with a sheepish smile.

The Vagabond hummed in thought, “Hm, not really. It’s pretty fifty-fifty between quieter and the livelier jobs. It’s a good balance.”

“I’m surprised; I thought you’d tear your hair out from this kind of work,” Chad teased good-naturedly.

It wasn’t that Chad still believed in the rumours surrounding the Vagabond, he’d learnt not take any of those at all seriously, but he had seen the Vagabond on the more ‘action-based’ operations; seen how he’d revelled in the chaos. There was some sort of dark enjoyment there, just not with killing innocents. From those short observations of the Fake AH member, Chad gathered that he would be too restless for stakeouts or any of the slower forms of assignments.

The Vagabond laughed briefly before giving a slight shrug, “Don’t get me wrong, I probably would lose it if I was left to backdrop jobs, but I could say the same about the more ‘fun’ side of things. Although those two forms of _losing_ it would probably be quite different to each other,” He smiled candidly.

 _You can’t say the guy’s not self-aware_ , Chad mused to himself.

He bobbed his head in understanding; he felt the same way to some degree, but was dumb-founded that the Vagabond had given such a responsible reply by admitting that he needed the balance.

“Kinda an accurate and surprisingly sensible way of looking at it,” Chad gently bantered, grinning while he spoke.

“I’m very sensible,” The Vagabond had said in an offended tone while he took a pointed drink of his coke, but the smile he gave after told Chad the truth.

“Is what I’m learning,” Chad assured in a somewhat contrived voice, barely concealing his own mirth.

The Vagabond smirked and aimed a suspicious glare towards the other, before his normal smile returned as he reciprocated Chad’s earlier question, “What about you? You seem to dabble in everything, like a jack of all trades.”

Chad stared blankly for a moment, nonplussed that the other noticed something like that, but snapped out of it fast enough for the pause to appear ordinary.

“Master of none,” He quickly quipped, then shrugged as he tried again, “I’m just happy to do whatever’s needed of me.”

“Like today,” The Vagabond offered with a knowing smile that almost came across as fondness.

“I don’t know if you could _technically_ call this a job any more, it turned out to be a pointless goose-chase because of some stupid intel I should never have listened to,” Chad jested ruefully.

Apparently catching the self-deprecating tone, the Vagabond gave Chad a pointed look, “That intel wasn’t completed off the mark; they were correct about the odd activities and the point of location, it was only the motive that they failed to figure out correctly. Even if we never thought it would turn out to be the truth, we still had to check it out. It was the _sensible_ thing to do,” He finished satirically.

Chad grinned but it wasn’t long before it fell. He couldn’t stop himself from questioning, “Wouldn’t the sensible thing to do be talking to them about it?”

“No. No, it wouldn’t. Not in Los Santos, you know that. They would have had to do the same if it were the other way round.”

Chad knew the Vagabond was right, but he couldn’t help feeling guilty as he looked at the group now, laughing and excited as they built up their new business, something not just for them but the entire AH circle. Funhaus were one of the less violent crews, even less willing to kill than Chad’s own crew were. They were probably wanting a way of making money and helping the faction without having to hurt anyone any more. Instead of dwelling on it and making the Vagabond have to comfort him any further (he was already slightly mortified) as part of one of their first conversations, he let it go and made to work past the subject quickly.

He nodded and smiled, “Yeah, you’re right. Thanks. So, any heists coming up?” He asked interestedly, a mild lilt of excitement in his tone.

If the Vagabond found the rushed change of conversation strange, he made absolutely no show of it as he obligingly talked about his crew’s plans and ideas he had for the future. Chad listened excitedly and gave advice to where the Vagabond had yet to think of solutions to potential problems; to his amusement Chad learned that the Vagabond was more of an ‘I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it’ type of planner. The Vagabond asked about Chad’s crew and he answered anything the fake wanted to know or seemed interested in.

Conversation flowed to more casual topics, such as; hobbies and interests, which then led to an extensive discussion about video games, then books, then (to Chad’s pleasant surprise) anime, then obscure TV shows, even theatre production at some point (he doesn’t really know how that came about). It was fun and animated, and Chad’s cheeks hurt from smiling and laughing so much while a ball of pride and giddiness would swell at his chest whenever he said or did something that would make the other man laugh in turn. It was amazing how comfortable and easy it was to talk to the Vagabond and how quickly the ice broke between them after all their initial non-interactions. Even if the thing that seemed to help them ‘break the ice’ the most was an unwarranted kiss (no matter how nice it was).

Just from the memory Chad’s face began to warm up _again_ and he prayed it didn’t show; and despite that the conversation hadn’t been waning in anyway, Chad ended up suggesting they go and help Funhaus with whatever they needed. A part of him regretted voicing the idea, having had realised that it was a rare opportunity to spend one-on-one time with the Fake AH member, whom it turned out Chad really enjoyed the company of. However, maybe that was half the reason he had said it, as well as the weird self-conscious spells that came about while he was around the other. There was some odd relief that seeped over Chad’s shoulders when the two joined the Funhaus team and he was no longer alone with the Vagabond. He didn’t attempt to analyse or dwell on the ‘why’ though as he laughed and worked with everyone.

It was past midnight when the duo had to leave, both with jobs in the morning, and after bidding farewell to Funhaus, they made their way back to the car. The drive back was filled with more talking and little moments of silence that now felt mutually comfortable than palpable. The journey was substantially quicker than the first, and Chad was a little surprised when they were already pulling into the Fakes’ garage.

When they had both exited the car, Chad looked over at the Vagabond and said, “Thanks again, man,” smiling appreciatively, still grateful the man had come along with him. He took a back-step in the direction of his car and fished out his keys as he waited on the other’s response.

The Vagabond had followed his step and asked, “You not coming up to see Geoff?” Chad missing the miniscule lilt of disappointment in the question.

Chad smiled apologetically, “I would, but it’s already late and I need to get back. I’ll catch him next time.”

“Fair enough,” the Vagabond nodded, “I’ll let him know what went on.”

“Thanks.”

Chad’s stomach sank a little at the notion of leaving and he hesitated to say goodbye. He simplified it the childish, jovial side of him that didn’t want to part with the new friend he’d made and felt it unlikely they’ll have a similar chance to hang out again. He was an adult though, so he could have simply asked the man if he wanted to meet up some time, he’d done it before when getting to know all the other crews in the AH faction. However, this time felt particularly nerve-wracking and Chad couldn’t make the words form. He wasn’t even sure if the Vagabond would want to meet again, unless it was for work.

Chad mentally shook himself and gave a casual, “Take care, Vagabond,” while putting a hand up briefly as a farewell gesture.

The Vagabond laughed through his nose, “Just call me Ryan.”

Chad suddenly felt embarrassed, and he wasn’t sure if it was because Ryan clearly found the use of his codename laughable, or from the happiness that sprouted at being directly given permission to refer the other by name.

“Oh,” Chad laughed sheepishly, “Right. Take care, Ryan,” he corrected, hoping he didn’t come across weird.

Ryan laughed again; though his boyish, slightly higher, cheerful laugh, as he said, “Take care, Chad. See you soon.”

Involuntarily, Chad’s smile grew wider at the sound of his name and gave a tentative, “See you,” before leaving in his own car.

On his way home, Chad wondered if the Vagabond was actually an extrovert or was just a skillful people-person; recalling how easy it was to talk to Ryan and how open he was. However, despite that easiness, Chad noticed how self-conscious he had been around the Fake AH member. He thought it could be from intimidation, although that didn’t really sit right to him.

He spent the rest of the drive home trying to ignore how saddened he had become when he remembered how unlikely it was that they’d spend time like that again.


	2. Chapter 2

A week had passed since the whole Funhaus debacle, and Chad, despite the many distractions of work, had failed not to think of Ryan. He put it down to intrigue and the general enjoyment of the other’s company; how laidback and carefree it was without it feeling awkward or stifling. He’d never admit to having had caught himself sinking with disheartenment that it was probably a onetime occurrence that happened by circumstance.

“So, any idea what we’re going to do about the Juggernauts?” Nick asked from his place seated on the couch.

Chad was across the room, sitting at the dining table pouring over some plans for a future heist as he waited on a call from a client. He briefly glanced over at his crew-mate before his eyes continued skimming over his papers.

The Juggernauts were a gang that Screw Attack had been trading goods (weapons, vehicles, etc) with for the past year, however, as of late, had become somewhat aggressive; suddenly unsatisfied with Screw Attack’s half of the deal. They’d even given passive-aggressive threats, implying a termination of their business if Screw Attack didn’t offer more, which would be absolutely fine with Chad. Unfortunately, the closure of a deal between criminals is not simply an end in business; it’s a lot more _finalised_ than that. Chad did what he could to avoid such conclusions and always tried negotiating before going in all guns blazing; even though his efforts always came out in vain. However, when it came to it, Chad was prepared to do what he had to to protect his crew.

“I’m gonna try giving them an out, if they’ll take it,” Chad replied, a little lethargic. 

Nick gave a thoughtful hum.

“We’ve got a while before we have to contact them again, we have time to come up with a plan,” Chad reassured, “I know we can’t keep avoiding it,” He added as he rubbed his cheek tiredly. 

Just then, his phone went of indicating a text message.

He lazily lifted his phone out of his jean’s pocket and looked down at the screen. He didn’t know the number, which wasn’t uncommon as most of the people who messaged him either used burner phones or hid their numbers; however, in spite of the casual tone, its contents shocked Chad far more than any threat or job proposal he’d received lately.

**Hey, it’s Ryan.  
I got your number from Michael. Hope that’s okay.**

The message then continued into a discussion they had started at Funhaus’s bar regarding podcasts they had recently been listening to, as if casually texting one another was something they’d always done. Chad hadn’t realised the bewildered expression his face adorned while he was intently read the message over.

“You alright, Chad?” Nick enquired uncertainly.

Chad’s eyes snapped away from his phone and out of his stupor to look at Nick; unable to stop the suspiciously cheerful grin that made its way onto his face. 

“Y-yeah, fine. I’m going to get a drink, you want anything?” He offered, already standing to go to the kitchen.

“I’m good, man,” Nick said as he watched Chad go, clearly suspicious.

When Chad reached the kitchen, he began working on his reply to Ryan, and if he put substantially more effort and time into the text than he would if it were to someone else, he chose not to acknowledge it.

That one text turned into two, then three, then four, until they were messaging each other every day. For a week it was just random topics; work, their day, informing each other of something they thought the other would enjoy (be it a TV show, a game, podcast, book, anime, weapons/vehicles, etc), subjects of interest and everything else that popped up. Chad learned that they both had planned to work in computer/IT related jobs before they ‘fell’ into their current ‘employment’, which led to a conversation of their computer builds (yes, they’re nerds), then PC versus console gaming, then weapons of choice, and so on and so forth; all subjects under the sun, except for the more sensitive, personal ones they skimmed around occasionally.

After that week, however, that routine shifted when Ryan unexpectedly invited Chad to come along with him on one of his tamer jobs. Chad had hesitated to reply, too surprised, which turned to nervous excitement; although, even with his uncertainties, the thought of turning down the invitation never crossed his mind. Eventually, he found the courage to reply, and he hoped it didn’t sound overly constructed or unlike his normal tone of messages. He tried his best to reassure himself it was fine; for the sake of his sanity.

The time until the planned meeting passed leisurely; Chad’s anticipation having had dragged it down to a slow crawl, yet, when the day finally did arrive, Chad panicked that it had come too soon. Ryan had picked him up in the morning to scout out a high-end tech store that the Fake AH crew planned to rob; something Gavin had been wanted to do for a while, Ryan told him. It was a thirty minute drive from the Screw Attack base and it took Chad a little bit to stop feeling awkward before he remembered how to act (or at least pretend to) like a normal human (whatever that might be); although, one of his knees persistently bounced with nervous energy the whole journey. 

Regardless that he had already discovered it, Chad continued to be stunned by how quick they could start a conversation and how fun and easy it was. Whenever Ryan smiled at him, Chad automatically smiled back as his heart rate curiously picked up. And even though they never had nothing to say to each other, they did let silences linger occasionally, both of them not overly chatty people by nature.

That day started an unplanned tradition that whenever either of them had a solo ‘quieter’ kind of job they’d invite the other along. However, it took a few more invites from Ryan before Chad felt comfortable enough to invite him in return, and once he took the first initiative and Ryan agreed so readily, it became easier to message the man again (although that peculiar nervousness never really went away). It made those somewhat tedious jobs into something Chad looked forward to. His crew were… surprised to say the least to find out about the new development between Chad and the Vagabond – never having had seen the two talk before. They seemed to let it go when Chad told them that they were assigned to a job together and had somehow hit it off, which was the truth, although he never disclosed what the job itself was.

Almost two months had gone by in that way; messaging, gaming-online, and doing odd jobs together, yet neither of the two had grown bored of the other and the novelty of their new friendship hadn’t worn off. Chad silently hoped it never would.

It was at around that time Funhaus had finally finished and announced the details regarding their ‘secret operation’ and everyone within the Fake AH faction had been sent an invitation to their bar’s grand opening. Funhaus persisted it was a mandatory event and all must attend– although Chad doubted there would be any real consequences for not going other than maybe a half-serious reprimanding letter from a member of the team (probably Bruce or James). They were cutting it quite close though, only giving a few days of advance notice before the day itself. Chad wondered if Ryan would go; he didn’t drink but Chad had seen him go to other similar gatherings in the past. 

Regardless of having gained the option to simply text and ask Ryan about it, Chad didn’t take advantage of it. He was worried how he might come across and was still overly self-conscious when it came to Ryan, which he guessed was due to admiration. He really liked Ryan; he was smart, funny, calm but wasn’t boring, patient, understanding. Not that he didn’t have flaws (which was a subjective word to use); he had an unpredictable temper (that Chad had yet to be the cause of), got defensive sometimes, had that something awfully sinister about him, stubborn in his opinions, although Chad never saw these as ‘faults’ per se, just more things he added in his ‘things that made Ryan, Ryan’ jar that resided somewhere in his head. 

Chad abruptly stopped his train of thought: the lists about Ryan he’d made… He stared down at the table he was sat at with a furrowed brow and small frown, suddenly worried. It was at that moment he was pulled out of his troubled feelings by Sam calling out for him to ‘get a move on’; they had a job to get to. Chad didn’t touch that area of thought for the rest of the week (although that didn’t mean his mind didn’t occasionally wander to the Fake AH member).

The couple of days that led to the bar opening went by in a flash, Chad having spent them overly occupied with an array of different jobs and dealings to notice. So when the day itself finally arrived he had only remembered an hour before he and his crew had to leave thanks to Sam reminding him. It took them forty minutes to drive to the bar, Screw Attack’s base being a little further out than some others’, but they were still able to get there at the bidden time (8:30pm).

As soon as they entered the bar they were almost immediately welcomed by most of the Funhaus gang. Chad congratulated them and complimented how great the place looked; they had done an amazing job and had done so much since he’d last seen it. They’d filled the space well with tables and booths that lined the walls, but without making it feel cluttered or crowded. It was a nice marriage of old, polished wood with modern fixings and light fixtures. It wasn’t too dark or light; the whole place had a perfect cosiness to it. 

After Chad had spoken to all the Funhaus members that had met him and his crew at the door (Bruce and Adam were serving at the bar area) he made his rounds and chatted with all the other gangs that had arrived before him; not acknowledging how his eyes searched for a particular person. He involuntarily lit up when he spotted Lindsay and Jeremy sat on the tall stools that hemmed the bar where Bruce and Adam were serving drinks.

“Hey guys,” He said cheerfully as he came up beside them.

The two turned to face him and greeted him in unison.

“Chad!” Jeremy had beamed while Lindsay had smiled and said, “Sup Chad,” in a milder tone, though no less happy to see him.

“This place is awesome,” Jeremy continued, gesturing to the bar.

“It is! It looks great; it’s so cool we have a place like this now,” Chad agreed enthusiastically.

“Yeah, and the location is perfect. It’s hidden and awkward enough to find that no citizen’s should easily come across it,” Lindsay added as she took a drink from her beer.

“Maybe too awkward, I think more than one crew got a little lost on the way here,” Jeremy laughed.

“Did _you_ guys get lost?” Chad smirked with a raised eyebrow.

“Uhh,” Jeremy and Lindsay looked at each other comically.

“’Er, no,” Lindsay said exaggeratedly.

“Yeah, Chad, who do you think we are?” Jeremy scoffed satirically.

Chad laughed along with the two when they broke out into laughter. He looked around for any sign for the rest of the duo’s gang but couldn’t see any of them.

Caving from his hopeful curiosity, Chad asked as casually as he could, “The others here?”

“The rest of the crew? They’re late, coming back from a deal out of town,” Jeremy explained as he looked at his phone, 

“They should be here soon. You need to talk to Geoff?”

“No, no, nothing like that, just excited to see you all together again. It’s been a while since I hung out with all you guys together,” It wasn’t a lie, although he wouldn’t admit, even to himself, that he was excited to see Ryan (despite that he saw him a week ago on a job).

“That’s true. It’s awesome to see everyone gathered like this,” Lindsay said looking around the room.

“Yeah, it’s rare,” Jeremy agreed.

Chad eventually pulled up a stool and got a beer from a very excited Bruce who, as well as Lawrence (who had traded out with Adam), joined in on the conversation every now and then. Jeremy hadn’t been wrong about the rest of the Fake AH crew arriving soon, because it wasn’t ten minutes before they were coming through the door being greeted by the rest of the Funhaus gang. Chad watched from where he sat, happy and relieved when he saw Ryan among them. He wanted to go over to him, but decided to leave the guy to make his rounds and talk to everyone else; probably sick of Chad by now. 

Instead, Chad tried to focus on the people around him; however, his gaze would occasionally, unconsciously, seek out that familiar black, white and blue biker jacket. The instant he caught himself, he’d correct himself and pull his eyes back to his current company. Although it wasn’t long before his eyes gravitated back to Ryan. He almost had a heart attack when he found Ryan staring back at him one time, and was too panicked to even save face and smile casually at the man, and ended up quickly looking away; a much more suspicious action. After that incident, Chad kept his eyes away from the Fake (although he had to fight the persistent urge to find him), but he still noticed when the other came into his peripherals.

A little later into the evening, Chad had taken to a quiet corner booth to sit alone at while he finished of his second beer. He ran a hand through his ginger hair, which was in its usual straightened, side-sweeping fringe style. He was oddly exhausted with all the interactions and socialness of the evening, and he had only been there a little over an hour; he wasn’t even the most introverted person there. He didn’t understand why he was struggling so much this particular night. Without really thinking about it, he dug out his red beanie from his back jeans pocket (where it didn’t actually fit and spent most of the time precariously half hanging out over the pocket’s lip) and pulled it over his head.

While he was adjusting it over his fringe and ears, someone slid into the seat opposite him. He automatically put on a friendly smile as he lifted his head to look at said person, but it faltered for a millisecond at the same time his heart skipped and his stomach flipped with nerves as his eyes met Ryan.

The smile returned fast though and he warmly said, “Hey,” hoping it sounded normal.

“Hi, Chad,” Ryan followed, giving a smile of his own. “You okay?”

“Oh, yeah, just a little tired,” Chad answered, the question startling him at first before he assumed Ryan was curious as to why he was sitting alone.

“Is that all?” Ryan asked coolly; though concern could be heard under his initial tone.

Chad started again, suddenly worried as if Ryan knew something he didn’t.

Uncertain and a bit hesitant, all Chad could do was give out a very eloquent, confused, “Uhhh,” sound.

Ryan laughed through his nose, then elaborated, “You have a tendency to put your beanie on when you’re stressed or nervous about something, whatever the weather may be,” He shrugged, then continued, “I mean, I dunno if that theory has any legs to stand on; it’s just something I noticed. I figured it was a defence mechanism.”

“Oh,” Chad laughed out, a little relieved before giving a thoughtful hum, “I guess I do do that, huh?” 

He’d never really observed that about himself, but now that Ryan mentioned it, the notion did actually fit. He wondered how many times he must have acted on that nervous habit during their times together for it to be something Ryan could discern so accurately. It was a little embarrassing that Chad could be seen through so easily and he worried if there was anything else Ryan (or anyone else) had picked up on.

Chad drank a few mouthfuls of beer before he went on, “I think it’s just been a while since I’ve been so, uh, chatty? Think I’m just a bit out of practice.”

“It _is_ kind of tiring,” Ryan agreed as he look at all the bodies that filled the room, “But I’m glad you came,” He added once he’d turned back to face Chad. 

Chad silently chastised the stutter of his heart, then smiling back he said, “You too, man,” nonchalantly, despite the truth behind the simple statement. 

And with that they were able to flow into good conversation, in spite of all of Chad’s inner frets and awkward moments. Chad’s mood instantly brightened merely by being in Ryan’s company, so much so that he was able to temporarily forget about those previous worries as he lost himself in the exchange. Even when they came to a disagreement of some sort, Chad always enjoyed their discussions.

“Some people aren’t worth negotiating with,” The topic of work had led Chad to briefly mention his small issue with the Juggernauts, a subject that had changed Ryan’s soothing and warm inflection into a stern and serious one. Chad had heard it before but was surprised that such a common gang occurrence (i.e. a feud between dealing crews) had conjured it.

“That’s true, but how will I know if they’re ‘worth it’ or not without giving them the chance?” Chad tried. He knew that he and Ryan had a few differences when it came to handling such conflicts; Ryan being more cut-throat while Chad gave a bit more mercy. However they were open enough with each other to debate their sides while respecting their differences. It never dampened their conversations either, although this particular conversation seemed to have put Ryan in a bad mood.

“It’s evidence enough with the way they’ve been trying to push you into a wall,” He grouched, almost harshly.

“Either way, I’ll have to meet up with them to settle things; I’m just going to give them the option to back out before the whole ‘fists and bullets’ sequence,” He offered, his tone jokey, hoping to lessen the stony expression Ryan held, 

“And who knows, maybe they’ll accept the chance to skip out on all that.”

“They won’t,” Ryan asserted bluntly, his frown not budging.

Chad shrugged and smiled, “Then they won’t.”

“You’re giving them a chance to get the drop on you,” Ryan went on to say, irritated and louder than before.

“We’ll be prepared, we always are. We might not do things the same way as AH, or Funhaus, or the Cock Bites, or whoever, but we’re just as capable,” Chad hoped to reassure as he expressed his true confidence in his team.

Ryan met Chad’s eyes with surprise; he looked troubled – a little regretful maybe. 

“I didn’t mean to imply you weren’t. I know what you guys can do- I just…” he trailed off while looking off to the side, then eventually conceded, “Sorry, I got a bit too hot there.” 

Chad was quick to assure him, “Its fine, man, don’t worry. I know the outcome isn’t always set in stone or anything, but we’ve dealt with this kind of thing a lot, and with a lot worse too.”

And it was true. Chad wasn’t one to underestimate any of his opponents, but he wasn’t one for underestimating his crew either.

There was a pause as Chad watched with curious interest while Ryan looked to have some sort of internal battle with himself, like he was holding back; unsure of him, which was a bizarre idea in itself for Ryan was one of the most confident people Chad knew. He eventually appeared to shake himself out of his inner thoughts and Chad wanted to ask if he was okay, concerned, but Ryan spoke before he could.

“Yeah, you’re right, and I’ve seen what you and your crew can do first hand: a force to be reckoned with,” The Fake assented with a proud smirk, “Plus, ‘The Juggernauts’? What a ridiculous name, they’re clearly over compensating for something.”

Chad chortled at the comment and any previous tension dissipated. Conversation continued enjoyably for Chad, though he thought he caught Ryan in that same internal struggle more than a handful or times before the night’s end. Many people ebbed and flowed, in and out of their company, but it would always return to just the two of them; newcomers eventually moving on to another group.

“Ah, look, it’s the happy couple,” was how they were interrupted some time later, causing the ‘couple’ in question to look up to find Jack, Geoff, Michael and Bolen approaching their booth.

“How surprising to find the two of you alone together,” Jack continued with an obviously sarcastic intonation.

Chad suddenly felt like he was in a teen, high-school flick, in the scene where the antagonists-bullies harass the protagonists-nerds. He stifled a laugh as his imagination planted a pinwheel cap upon Ryan’s head while kindly giving himself a pocket protector and pair of glasses with tape fastened around the bridge. 

He brushed it off quick enough to reply, “Uh, hey guys,” uncertainly with a half-smile.

“Bolen was just telling us how happy he was for you two,” Geoff joined in with a smirk on his face.

“Uhhh,” Chad started before it moulded into nervous laughter.

“Sorry, I know I said I would keep quiet but-as Jack just said- I was so happy for you two, I couldn’t keep the news to myself,” Bolen said, not sounding at all apologetic, in Chad’s opinion.

“And we thought this was such a good occasion, between Funhaus’s bar opening and you two hooking up, to have a small toast,” Michael said, a little too cheerfully for Chad’s liking, as he generously presented Chad with a new beer and Ryan a diet coke.

“We were real hurt that you didn’t feel as if you tell us,” Geoff guilt-tripped, “And Bolen got to see such a touching scene between you two, but now you don’t have to sneak around anymore.” 

_Where are they going with this?_

Chad was growing more concerned and confused the more the four spoke.

“Right… So, what’s your point here?” Ryan asked, unimpressed as he looked at them with one slightly raised eyebrow.

“Well, to celebrate your relationship coming out, and to make up for leaving us, your dear friends, in the dark; you should have a liberating, celebratory kiss,” Geoff insisted a little too gleefully.

Chad wished he’d been more surprised at the reveal of their obvious plan; using Bolen as a device to force them into another embarrassing situation, and it was all the more apparent by the glint in their eyes that they only had malevolent intent. And it was possible that ‘malevolent’ was an exaggerated choice of word, but Chad thought it very well deserved. His heart was hammering in his chest by the mere prospect of having to kiss Ryan again and a bunch of feelings and thoughts he’d be trying to suppress broke through to his foremost attention, unable to overpower them back into submission.

“How is being forced to kiss ‘liberating’?” Chad griped in a mumble, his nerves translating out into rare irritation (though it was still considerably mild).

“We’re being supportive,” Michael assured, while his smirk only showed otherwise.

It was obvious this wasn’t about ‘support’ though. When Bolen spilled about Ryan and Chad’s ‘relationship’ to Geoff, Geoff must have put two and two together and understood that it was to mislead Bolen from the real purpose of their job. And instead of correcting him or revealing the truth, Geoff, being the wonderful person that he was, decided he needed to milk the situation for all it’s worth. With Bolen still believing the two were in a relationship, and the two not being able to disclose their real reasons for lying without Geoff’s say so, they would have to continue the charade.

“This isn’t support,” Chad lamented, but inserted some humour behind it so as to mask his very authentic nerves.

“Aw, come on, guys, why are you so against it? You weren’t _lying_ or something, were you?” Michael enquired disingenuously, barley hiding his smug grin.

Chad had to stop himself from sighing, rolling his eyes and loudly demanding ‘why’ to no one and everyone.

“No one said we were against it, we just don’t understand why we should exploit our relationship for you sick fucks,” Ryan disputed, crossing his arms over his chest.

Bolen’s brows knitted together, looking at the pair suspiciously, “He’s got a point though; you two are taking this real seriously. It’s weird. Even Chad seems stressed.”

At that, Chad tried to school his face into one of indifference, cursing himself for letting some of his tensions show. He inwardly sighed in defeat, feeling drained along with a mysterious bout of sadness.

“Oh, for God’s sake, we were just trying to hold onto our integrity, but if it’ll shut you up,” He said, getting out of his seat.

_Sorry, Ryan._

He half expected Ryan to protest more, so he was a little surprised when the blonde simply stood with him. He was probably more fed up with this than Chad was and wanted to get it over with. Chad tried to disregard how a small lump formed in his throat at that last thought. 

The four backed up to give the couple room as they stood, the smiles on their faces large and smug as they buzzed with anticipation. At the sight of those grins Chad regretted he hadn’t fought more, but Ryan had already taken a step closer to him. He was nervous, somehow even more so than the first time; his chest felt like it was going to burst, his face hot and tingling. He tried to even out his breathing but with Ryan so close it was impossible.

Chad once again kept his arms by his sides and Ryan in turn did the same. They met half-way, although Chad was slower to move forward, his nerves stuttering his desire to proceed and he couldn’t look Ryan in the eyes. As they moved inwards, Chad’s heart-rate slowed, the anticipation reaching its peak, while his head filled with cotton. Then, when their lips finally met and their eyes closed shut, everything fell to a stop.

The kiss resembled their first; closed mouthed, firm and sweet, and it was just as intimate and intense for Chad, if not more so, as the first. Although, Chad thought he felt Ryan lean in further, push harder into it than he had with the previous one, and it took _everything_ Chad had not to push back and to keep his hands to himself. It was most likely (if not positively) his imagination; although, even if it wasn’t, it would have been Ryan putting on a believable show.

When they broke apart, the scruff of their beards scratched against each other and Chad could hear the quiet brushing sound even above all the bar noises, as well as the hysterical laughter to his left. Then all that noise abruptly amplified as if his head had breached the water’s surface.

Chad, after shaking himself mentally and continuing to avoid Ryan’s eye, turned to the almost collapsing four beside him.

“Oh my God,” Michael choked out between breaths of laughter.

“Aw, you guys are adorable,” Jack commented over his chuckles.

“You’re really good actors too, if Geoff hadn’t clued me in to what was up I would have believed it all over again,” Bolen told the two, looking very pleased with himself.

Chad froze at Bolen’s words. He wanted to punch himself; he should have realised there would be no way Bolen (or any of them) would force a PDA on them if he genuinely believed their relationship. His eyes fluttered closed in frustration and loathing as he groaned under his breath, which only made the group laugh harder.

“You’re all assholes,” He told them petulantly.

He chanced a quick side-glance towards Ryan who had his arms crossed matched with a displeased expression, so much so that the four’s laughter dampened a little, though didn’t stop. His withering stare cracked a moment later as he rolled his eyes and shook his head disapprovingly.

“Is this really how you spend your time outside of work: concocting ways to get your friends to make out in front of you?” He questioned disdainfully.

Geoff had to subdue his cackles to reply, “No, just you two.”

Chad had only been half hearing the conversation, having drifted into his head, wearily poking at the bittersweet feelings and thoughts that had planted themselves there all those weeks ago, and had slowly manifested into something far bigger since. The kiss with Ryan seemed to feed it, like Chad had feared it would, and he was left troubled by it.

Mistaking Chad’s expression of unease for one of sulking, Geoff clapped a hand on his shoulder and said, “Aw, come on, don’t be like that, we all owe you both a drink each, okay?” As he began veering Chad towards the bar, the others and Ryan in tow.

The evening progressed along with everyone’s alcohol intakes (minus the non-alcohol drinkers and designated drivers). Chad had reached his sixth beer and was only a little tipsy (having a high alcohol tolerance, despite being a pretty lean dude) and had been rotating through different company. Unfortunately, news of the kiss prank had spread, which induced a course of teasing from every group he approached; fortunately, it would end after a few jabs at Chad’s expense. Chad wore what he hoped was his regular demeanour and took every mention of the kiss in stride; joking along and laughing, while trying to keep that grey cloud that stalked him at bay (but failing).

He hadn’t meant to, but he quickly realised he had been avoiding Ryan since after the kiss. It was childish yet he couldn’t stop himself from keeping a certain distance from the AH member…and he knew why. He had known from the start of it - his feelings for Ryan. It’s not as if he had been denying it, he just hadn’t wanted to acknowledge it; just shuffled and skirted around the fact, but not prepared to do anything about it. He liked Ryan a lot, enjoyed his company a lot and, as cliché at is sounded, he didn’t want to do anything to damage that. They were close, despite it only having been a few months, and it had been so _good_ ; he’d never become so close to someone so quickly, and Chad had no desire to ruin that. It was just very unfortunate that he had come to like Ryan so much, passed friendship. It would have been fine if it had just been a brief infatuation or crush, but it wasn’t. It was more than a passing fancy or a physical attraction. He knew this feeling…and, again, it was unfortunate. Unlucky maybe. But it was fine. _He_ was fine.

 _Just gotta…wait it out._ He told himself with some sort of attempt at optimism.

At some point Chad had found himself back in the comfort of his own crew and was in a playful argument with Torrian, Nick and the others about one of the newest animes they’d been watching.

There was a small moment during all the ruckus that Sam discretely asked, “You all right, man?” So not to draw attention to them.

Chad hadn’t been surprised that if anyone was going to notice his solemn mood and see beyond the mask of his usual self, even while a little intoxicated, it would be Sam; his oldest friend. And, for the briefest of moments, Chad considered being honest; however, decided against it as he believed someone else knowing his feelings would just make it harder to forget and get past them.

He offered his friend a sheepish smile, “Yeah, just could go for another beer,” he laughed and feigned a drunken stumble as he stood to head over to the bar, hoping Sam would put his sullen mood down to drunken spacy–ness if he suspected Chad to be more inebriated than he originally thought. It appeared to have worked seeing as Sam’s look of concern morphed into amusement; laughing as he watched Chad wobble.

“Don’t fall on your ass on the way,” Sam called after him.

When Chad reached the bar he ordered another beer, regardless of not really wanting one, and chatted with Elyse and Matt who had switched in as bartenders. It wasn’t long before that seventh beer was gone and he was ordering his eighth. Matt and Elyse soon became too busy with other patrons to continue conversation with Chad, but he remained sat at the bar, not bothered to move as he turned his beer bottle over in his hands.

Not too long afterwards, someone settled in the seat beside his and a small surge of nervousness ran from through him. It dawned on him that he was anticipating a certain person. When he inevitably turned to the individual, he exhaled out a deep breath he hadn’t realised he’d been holding, relieved (and a little disappointed) by the sight of Geoff Ramsey facing him with a lazy smile.

“Sup, Chad,” The crew boss began, cheersing Chad’s beer bottle with his own, “You enjoying yourself?”

Chad smiled automatically as he replied, “Yeah,” raising his voice a pitch to mimic something like enthusiasm, “and yourself?”

“Anything can be enjoyed where there’s alcohol,” Geoff philosophised, lifting his bottle of beer, “Have to admit though, those Funhaus guys sure know how to make a decent bar.”

Chad agreed whole-heatedly with the statement.

Geoff took a look around them, as if searching for something, before he enquired, “So where’s your kissing buddy?”

Chad rolled his eyes at the way of address, followed by an unimpressed look, but answered anyway, “I don’t know. Haven’t seen him,” He tried to come off as casual as possible, taking a swig of beer for good measure.

“The kiss scare him off?” Geoff joked with a smirk.

Chad laughed but it came out wryly. He had been too busy avoiding Ryan to realise that the other could be doing just the same, however, for an entirely different reason. He had probably been uncomfortable or disgusted, which was quite a reasonable (if not expected) reaction. Chad could understand that… And he wanted to laugh at how hurt he felt. He started to fear when he and Ryan would eventually interact again; he didn’t want what he already suspected to be confirmed. 

“Probably,” He chuckled, but he didn’t find it funny at all.

Geoff laughed further at the response, and when it died down he said, “Nah, I doubt it, he likes you too much.”

Chad’s inwardly flinched at the words, but was quick to roll with the punches.

“Right,” Chad said sarcastically with a smirk on his face, sticking with the joke.

Geoff grinned while shaking his head, “I’m serious – you’re the only person outside the crew that he’s taken any initiative with, and he’s never liked doing solo jobs with others, before you anyway. Wish I’d figured out how well you two would get on earlier,” Then took a long drink from his beer.

Chad’s voice got stuck in his throat; not sure what to say or how to uncoil the tightness around his chest. He was so happy and glad-if it were true-that Ryan enjoyed his company where he normally wouldn’t any. He wanted to ask Geoff questions, to confirm it, and he suddenly realised he was one of those stereotypical teenagers in TV shows that would ask ‘so what did he/she say about me?’ He mentally scoffed at himself. However, as happy as that news had made him, he also felt so…sad (for lack of a better word). It made him feel guiltier about his feelings and the pressure of not ruining things had only intensified. It was suffocating.

Once his beer was back down on the bar, Geoff carried on, “I mean, I absolutely see it now; you’re both _so_ similar, yet not at all either.”

Chad shook his head at the confusing, contradictory, apparent observation, and laughed weakly, “What?”

Seemingly exasperated by Chad response, Geoff huffed, “You know what I mean, that yin and yang ideology,” as he waved his hand in some flippant gesture. 

Chad smiled sadly to himself. It was as nice idea if that’s how they worked; he didn’t want to speak for Ryan but Chad certainly felt they had a nice balance. He just had to make sure to not knock things off kilter, he thought ruefully. 

He shook it off and quipped, “Like Gavin and Michael,” grinning towards Geoff.

Geoff smirked, “More like Lindsay and Michael.”

Chad tried to laugh, however it came out obviously strained and his smile cracked. He briefly panicked Geoff had seen through him, but by the teasing look on the man’s face, he hadn’t. However, he had seen Chad’s smile falter at the joke.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, all humour gone as he leaned towards Chad.

Chad recovered fast. He packed on a cheery guise and was quick to reassure the gang boss, “Uhh, was just suddenly hit with a wave of nausea. Guess that’s what I get for drinking a dozen beers on a day I forgot to eat,” He laughed sheepishly. That last part wasn’t a lie either; he’d had a busy time of jobs and planning, causing him to be out for most of the day. It wasn’t as if it happened often; though he supposed the lack of food was probably the reason as to why the alcohol was hitting him a little harder that night.

Geoff looked disapproving as he said, “Jesus, dude, are you an idiot?” Then proceeded to order a glass of water and a variation of bar-snack foods.

Chad smiled fondly at the man as he did so, and thanked him when he paid for them without a second thought. He then continued to nag Chad about his stupidity, before the subject finally changed to other topics. It was a nice distraction from his theme of thoughts that night and Geoff was an easy, nice guy to talk to; his tired eyes were always calming and unjudging. They spoke for a half an hour before Geoff was called back to his table where’d he’d been hanging out with the Cock Bites. He invited Chad to join them but Chad politely declined, telling him he’d be heading over to his own table soon. 

Chad actually didn’t have much intention of returning to his crew’s table, but he hadn’t wanted Geoff to feel obligated to bring him along. And, to be honest, he was all out of social energy and he was somewhat drunk (the water and snacks had helped a little though). His body was uncomfortably warm and, although he realised it wasn’t necessarily the environment, he felt smothered. He stumbled a little as he stood and made his way over to the exit, so that he might sober up outside. A few gangs had left, it being past 1am, but it was still relatively busy, so he was both surprised and grateful that no one noticed him leave.

Once he was outside he was relieved to find no one else there, and sat down at the wall of the building – no outside seating had been installed yet. He stretched his legs out in front of himself, crossed them at the ankles, shoved his hands inside his pockets, and let his head hang down lazily. The noises from inside the bar were gradually drowned out as Chad was easily coerced into his thoughts; the alcohol and his general state of mind making him less grounded and aware of his present surroundings. 

He couldn’t stop thinking about Ryan and it was killing him. It was so overwhelming and he wished he wasn’t so easily affected by it or that those thoughts/feelings weren’t so ‘active’; for them to become something cognitively docile, like breathing. How he had been able to mute them in the earlier days was beyond him. Despite having experienced lov- this kind of affection before, it didn’t at all mean he knew what to do or even how to start the whole ‘getting over it’ process.

The saddest, most difficult part for Chad, besides not having a requited or mutual love, was that…he didn’t _want_ to get over it; he didn’t want to get over _him_. That was a first.

Too consumed in his thoughts, and a little too drunk, Chad failed to hear the door open beside him, or notice the few footsteps that followed. It was only after someone had sat a few feet away from him, and a pair of jean-cladded legs (one stretched out, the other bent upwards) entered his side view, that he realised he was no longer alone. His breath hitched and his heart-rate fluctuated; something that had become a recurring reaction to the other man’s presence. As well as a swirling mix of fear and happiness that pulled Chad every which way.

Ryan didn’t say anything for a while and that would normally have been comforting, if Geoff’s words weren’t circling around in Chad’s head. He worried that Ryan might like him less as a friend or that he was bothered about the kiss earlier, or, even worse, he could have somehow figured out Chad’s feelings for him.

He made himself so panicked he ended up breaking the silence, while forcing a light tone of voice, “Uh, I’m, uh, sorry about earlier. I should have realised that they were messing with us.” He wanted to say more-to apologise more-but he knew that would only come across as suspicious if he were to defend himself too much. 

There was a short pause, which caused Chad’s worry to increase, before Ryan finally replied, “It’s fine. It that why I haven’t seen you since then?”

He hadn’t sounded mad, nevertheless, Chad had stiffened with guilt and unease that Ryan had noticed his disappearing act, and wished he had the courage to look over at him.

“Kind of, I wanted to get away from the four stooges,” He was quick to laugh out the lie.

Ryan didn’t laugh back and Chad grew nervous that the other could tell he was lying, but then Ryan inquisitively asked, “Were you troubled over the kiss?”

“Oh, no, it wasn’t that,” He assured fervently, “I guess I was just embarrassed and worried you might be bothered by it,” he finished, choosing his words carefully.

“I wasn’t bothered by it,” Ryan responded plainly, then continued in a slightly teasing, curious tone, “But I’m surprised, you recovered pretty quickly from the first kiss.”

 _It was easier back then_ , Chad thought sadly, but he was glad that Ryan’s attitude picked up somewhat.

“Guess I felt more self-conscious in front of a bigger audience,” He laughed sheepishly, before he added good-humouredly, “But, second time, also good.”

He instantly regretted those words though because, even if he had said it as a joke and there was no real evidence to reveal how much he really meant it, it still created a burst of panic that Ryan would hear some hidden truth within them.

However, Ryan echoed Chad’s tone as he agreed, “Good, solid kisses.” Chad was relieved Ryan had taken it as humour while he ignored how his faced warmed up. “What are you doing out here?” The Fake casually asked after a moment.

Chad looked over at Ryan briefly with a half-feigned smile but avoided his eyes as he said, “Trying to sober up.”

“Is it working?”

“Not really.”

“How many have you had?”

“Hmm…ten? A dozen? ...I don’t remember.” 

“I can tell by the slurring.”

“How dare you.”

The two continued to playfully banter a little while longer and Chad cherished the normalcy as he pretended he had regular feelings of friendship for the Fake.

Then Ryan brought in a voice of coolness that he often used to cover his genuine interest and/or concern, “You’ve seemed kind of stressed tonight.”

Chad hoped Ryan didn’t notice how his face dropped shortly or how he almost flinched; the words having startled him. And he couldn’t tell if it was because of Ryan or the alcohol that stopped him from completely denying it, “Eh, only by my own fault though.”

It was then he realised how dangerous it was to be around Ryan while he was drunk; his inhibitions having waned somewhat. 

“How so?”

“Brain, stupid,” he ineloquently mumbled.

Ryan snorted, “Nah, I don’t think that’s it. What’s your brain thinking that’s worrying you?”

Chad opened his mouth to answer before almost immediately closing it; extremely concerned by how easily he was about to respond with ‘you’. At that realisation he panicked and stood up abruptly, making his drunken self nearly lose balance in the process. Ryan quickly followed his movement, probably worried he’d fall, and took a hold of Chad’s upper arm to support him. Chad had to stop himself from both flinching away and leaning into the warm touch where it felt like it was burning into his skin. Instead, he stood frozen as they stood opposite each other, only a foot apart, while looking at Ryan properly for the first time since he came outside. 

“What’s wrong?” Ryan asked, calm but the concern in his eyes was clearly evident. 

Chad laughed weakly, “Sorry, suddenly felt like I was gonna be sick. I’m gonna go to the bathroom and then probably head out.”

He said that, however, made no move to leave; just stood there focused on the feel of Ryan’s hand on his arm. It came to him that he’d never let himself voluntarily touch Ryan, all too aware (while pretending not to have been) of his feelings and not wanting to humour or fuel them.

Ryan hadn’t moved away either and his expression turned to something unreadable. Chad worried how transparent he was, that Ryan could tell he was lying and had seen into his current thoughts. That alone made Chad push away as he endeavoured a quick amicable goodbye to the Fake, even remembering to mention to text the other about the book Ryan had recommended earlier that night once he’d read it.

He didn’t look back afterwards and that was the last he saw of Ryan that night, Chad having left with his crew not long after.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eh, not great, I know. Not very proud of this. Tenses are everywhere and I got lazy at the end. Hope you still manage to enjoy it though and I really appreciate you reading it, thank you!
> 
> If you see any glaringly obvious mistakes, feel free to let me know, or not, it's your call.


	3. Chapter 3

The three weeks that followed the night of Funhaus’s bar opening consisted of an array of small failings on Chad’s part, between not having the courage to meet with Ryan, despite the invitations, and a work ‘negotiation’ that had gone slightly awry. 

Not only was he avoiding meeting with Ryan but he also found himself being less involved or enthusiastic in his texts; it hadn’t been a conscious decision, although even once he realised his behaviour he couldn’t break it. He hadn’t been able to quieten his feelings or move out of his melancholic funk; if anything it’d only grown worse, and the nicer Ryan was and the more he tried to get closer to Chad, the more it hurt.

Then there was the business with the Juggernauts that hadn’t gone to plan. Screw Attack had finally met with the opposing crew, presenting them with the proposed offer of a mutual, amicable termination and, as expected, they declined and a gang fight began. Screw Attack having had been the more experienced, combat-heavy crew, while the Juggernauts were mainly a selling and dealing focused crew, had a strong start and it appeared as if they would come away from the battle unscathed. However, suddenly amidst the beginning of the gun-fight, a second crew joined the conflict on the side of the Juggernauts (having most likely been paid) in a surprise attack, which successfully caught Screw Attack off-guard. As luck would have it though, although the joining team were somewhat more capable in a fight than the Juggernauts, they were still overly reckless and only ended up delaying the Juggernauts’ (and their own) end.

Despite having successfully won the fight, however, not one Screw Attack member came away unharmed after that surprise attack; though, none of the injuries were too serious or life-threatening. The only person who got something a bit more than a surface wound was Chad, who received a bullet through the shoulder (luckily, only going through soft-tissue) and a knife wound that started right next to his ear, down his jaw, and finished at the middle length of his neck. The cut went downwards, diagonally by only a hair (it was almost completely straight), and it had kept to the very right side of his face. It started as quite a deep cut but became shallower as the attacker had cut downwards, so, the part at his neck became only a scratch that didn’t hit anything other than flesh. It had bled a lot where it was deepest but was, along with his shoulder, quickly fixed up by himself and his crew as soon as they were able. 

Now, only a week later, Chad found himself once again riding the elevator up to the Fake AH penthouse, like he had done those three or four months ago. Unlike back then though, he wasn’t alone; himself and Sam had a meeting with Geoff and Gavin to help them investigate a rumoured huge crime group (possible mafia) that were supposedly relocating to Los Santos. They were short on hands, most of the Fakes and other alliancing crews busy with other, more immediate business, and Chad and Sam were the only ones with a coinciding slot of free time with the talents they needed. Chad excelled at hacking and would assist Gavin (a fellow hacker) searching through a variety of databases to find information on the group while Geoff and Sam gathered leads through outside and internal resources.

Due to his shoulder injury, which was only a week old, Chad had been taken off field work for a while, so, he was grateful for the opportunity to get out of Screw Attack’s HQ. He’d still been busy, despite the protests of his crew members, with off-field work but he thought he’d go crazy under bed arrest. The cut on his face was also healing and although it no longer needed a bandage, Chad had kept one on where it looked angriest - it looked a lot worse than it actually was, and he didn’t want others to have to see it.

Chad looked forward to working with Gavin, he was fun, good-natured and they would have races of cracking different confidential databases. Also, it appeared there was no danger of an awkward encounter with Ryan because, as previously mentioned, everyone was busy elsewhere.

Chad knocked on the door and smiled as it was opened by a cheery Gavin, but that cheerfulness was quickly wiped away when he saw Chad.

“Chad, what happened, dude?” Gavin exclaimed loudly in shock, while looking between the bandage on Chad’s face and the dressing peeking out of his t-shirt’s sleeve and neckline where it wrapped around his shoulder injury.

Sam turned to Chad unimpressed, “Didn’t think to mention the slash down your face?”

“Oh, uh, I forgot, sorry, Gav. It’s just a small cut, the bandage is just a precaution,” He reassured sheepishly. The cut itself didn’t hurt much at all, just a few twinges here and there but was overall fine; however, the bullet wound still hurt horribly even with the pain pills he was taking. Despite the pain, he made sure not to complain or give any clue to it, in fear he’d be forced into permanent bed rest.

Geoff eventually appeared soon after, probably having heard Gavin’s shout, and gave a very similar reaction to Chad’s bandages, leading Sam to briefly go over the story of what went down with the Juggernauts. When the two Fakes heard about Chad’s bullet wound they told him he didn’t have to stay and could return home to rest, but Chad had had to stay in bed being intensively treated for six days and he almost went mad. It was by no means healed, but he had promised his crew not to do anything vigorous or use his shoulder at all for at least a month; only doing off-field work. He also argued how _everyone_ in the crew got injured, not only him, and they were all continuing work as usual; unfortunately, Sam felt the need to interject with how everyone else only went away with a couple scratches and bruises. It took a while for his crew to agree to free him from house arrest.

After a bit more fussing from the two Fakes, they eventually conceded and started the meeting. Although they were worried, they weren’t nearly as overbearing as his own crew and Chad was massively grateful for it; he’d seen a lot of other crew members from other gangs get far more injured with even less recovery time and he didn’t like the idea of not being able to pull his own weight. The four had sat in the Fake’s large planning room; getting started at around 1:30.p.m. and ended up finishing at 5:50.p.m. The good news was that the group they were investigating turned out to be a lot smaller than first rumoured and that they weren’t actually moving into the Fake AH crew’s territory but out far north passed Grapeseed. They might be something of a concern in the future but for now they were no threat.

“Well that was a fucking waste of time,” Geoff griped as he fell onto the couch while holding a glass of whisky, the motion almost causing it to spill. 

They had moved into the lounge after their work was done and were strewn about on the large, white sofas that resided in the centre of the room.

“That’s not true, it’s a huge weight off to know they’re not a problem right now,” Sam tried to assure good-naturedly.

“Yeah, ‘right now’,” Geoff replied pessimistically, but it held a slight humour to it, “Well, thanks for coming to help out,” He added in a lighter, appreciative tone.

“Thank you for giving me a reason to get out of the office,” Chad grinned.

Geoff held up his glass as he replied, “You are welcome. Now take a seat and get a drink.”

“Can’t: on meds,” Chad told him.

“We have diet coke, or water,” Gavin offered where he hovered by the fridge, mid- way to getting himself a beer.

“Water then, please,” Chad answered thankfully.

“Sam?”

“Uh, I’ll have a beer, sure, thanks.”

Gavin brought over two beers and a water, and the group fell into pleasant chatter and playing video games. It was nice and an hour flew in the blink of an eye before Geoff was ordering them all food. Then, just as Geoff was putting down the phone, the door to the penthouse opened and a collection of footsteps could be heard coming towards the lounge, quickly revealing the rest of the Fake AH crew. They were all covered in dirt and ash, however, none of them appeared hurt by the way Jeremy and Michael whooped happily of a job well done.

“Hey, I didn’t think you guys would be back today,” Geoff said over the back of the couch when they came into view, pausing the game as he did.

“We were closer to here than any of our places and we wanted to clean up,” Jack explained calmly.

“Hi, Chad. Hi, Sam,” Lindsay affably greeted; the others following suit after she’d drawn attention to them, which then led to more comments on Chad’s bandages, similar to Gavin and Geoff’s.

Chad replied the best he could, however, was distracted by his internal panic of Ryan’s sudden appearance and being very aware of the other’s eyes on him. It didn’t help Chad’s nerves that Ryan’s stare came from behind his eerie skull mask. Chad made himself busy by talking to the other newly arrived gang members so that it didn’t seem as if he was purposely ignoring his masked friend, but rather that he hadn’t seen him yet.

After some brief chatter about the job itself, the group eventually disappeared towards the back of the apartment to get washed and changed. Once they slowly began reappearing, they joined in on the festivities of food and video games. Chad had tried to find a casual way to leave but there was no convincing excuse he could make while Sam was with him; Sam knew he had no plans or jobs that night, and they’d arrived in Sam’s car, so, Chad couldn’t even make a quiet escape if he tried. He had worried over what to say to Ryan when he inevitably returned, however, apparently there was no need to because when Ryan re-entered the lounge he had made no move to approach Chad and sat with Jack and Lindsay on another couch instead. He was surprised, he would have thought Ryan would want to hear all about the Juggernaut job, but he guessed he should be grateful to avoid a difficult encounter...

The thirty minutes that preceded grew increasingly uncomfortable for Chad, by no fault of anyone’s but his own; and in a small way to alleviate some of his tense energy and to gain some space, went to the fridge to get another bottle of water. It was a pretty poor way to seek distance, however, as the kitchen joined the lounge with no wall separating the two rooms. While he pulled out a water from the fridge he felt a presence beside him and almost jumped out of his skin when he glanced up to see Ryan stood ominously by him, for some reason, still adorning the mask.

“Whoa! Dude, you almost killed me,” He gasped, which morphed into a nervous laugh.

Ryan didn’t laugh back and simply asked in a flat, low tone, “Can we talk?” And without even waiting for a response, walked to the planning room, expecting Chad to follow, which of course Chad did. His feelings aside, Chad was genuinely worried that something bad had happened and was concerned what had put his friend in such a bad mood.

The planning room was one of the largest rooms in the penthouse and was divided in half; the far half being comprised of narrow tables that were shaped in a bracket to face a large board, while the first half was an open space where the walls were lined with utility boxes and fold-up chairs. Chad and Ryan stood in the first half, about five feet away from one another. Chad was thankful for the loud noises of the crew having fun and playing video games coming down the hallway and through the walls, it took away some of the attention off of the silence hanging between them.

Once Ryan had closed the door behind them, Chad had expected for him to fall into conversation, explaining what had him so bothered. But he didn’t, he said nothing and with only his serious, almost angry stare, Chad couldn’t help but want to break the tense quiet somehow. 

While trying to find a subject to do just that, Chad realised that Ryan kept looking between the bandages on his face and arm, and sheepishly joked, “Come to say, ‘I told you so’?” 

He instantly regretted those words though, quickly realising how spiteful they sounded, but he hadn’t meant it that way; he was just nervous. The skull mask wasn’t really helping his unease either, as it limited Chad’s ability to read the other and left him with only Ryan’s stern yet also harrowingly blank eyes to discern an emotion from. It then occurred to Chad that Ryan resembled his ‘Vagabond’ state, as the other Fakes liked to joke; a form of Ryan that resonated something sinister and was near impossible to read by face value. Maybe Chad should just have been relieved it wasn’t his ‘Mad King’ state instead; although, at least he might have laughed more.

A beat of nothing went by before Chad contritely said, “Sorry, bad joke.” 

“Sure was,” Ryan dully confirmed, the look in his eyes unmoving.

Concerned, Chad took a step towards him and kept eye-contact as he asked, “Are you okay? Still riled up from the job?”

That seemed to awaken Ryan slightly and he finally pulled off his mask, but his demeanour remained terse. Chad had no idea what was troubling his friend, yet he had an awful feeling it might relate to him. He hadn’t wanted to admit it at the time, but when Ryan had first come through the penthouse’s front-door he had seemed fine, jolly like the rest of them; however, it wasn’t until he spotted Chad did his demeanour change. He hoped he had observed wrongly or that he’d made some sort of mistake, for just the notion of Ryan holding any sort of disdain for him hurt incredibly.

“I’m fine,” Ryan assured, looking away before finally meeting Chad’s eyes. His expression had definitely softened, though there was still a hardness to it.

The answer itself didn’t do much to appease Chad’s worries and he wanted to press more on the subject, though, he had spent enough time with Ryan to know that pushing didn’t work with him and being patient was the best route. 

Busy in his worried thoughts, it was Ryan who spoke up again, “You could have called me.”

Chad’s brow furrowed, “About what?”

“Your meeting with the Juggernauts. I would have come,” Ryan explained gruffly.

With a grateful, fond smile, Chad said, “Dude, we already talked about that. It was our problem.”

“We’re here to help- I’m here to help,” He argued roughly.

In spite of the kind of harsh tone, Chad could read between the lines and understood that Ryan was worried about him; he had been since he’d first heard about the situation from Chad. The red-head was relieved when he realised that Ryan’s concern on this issue might be why he was so upset, and that it hadn’t been something worse. Although, Chad felt a surge of self-loathing and guilt when his chest swelled with happiness at Ryan being concerned over him, especially when Ryan had reinstated, ‘ _I’m_ here to help’. 

“I know, but we didn’t think we needed it, and even with the ‘complications’, we managed just fine,” Chad reassured him sheepishly.

Even more severe than before, Ryan countered, “I don’t think getting shot in the shoulder and sliced down the face constitutes as ‘fine’,” While his arms went to his sides from where they’d been crossed over his chest and he stood straighter.

Unfazed by Ryan’s anger, Chad replied, “I think in our line of work, simply surviving counts as ‘fine’.”

“I could have prevented it from happening,” Ryan tried again, his anger dissipating gradually.

Chad knew Ryan was a protective person and had seen as much with how Ryan reacted to his crew-mates being hurt; the same kind of anger expressed worrying. However, he hadn’t seen it quite as intense as it seemed right now, or as persistent. Plus, he didn’t like how Ryan expressed a level of guilt for what happened to Chad, like is was somehow his responsibility. 

“You could say that about anything,” He laughed lightly, trying to reassure the other, “Ryan, it’s okay, man, why are you putting this on yourself?” He asked in what he hoped came across as comforting.

There was a pause before Ryan said in a subdue sigh, “I just wish I had been there.”

“It wouldn’t have changed anything,” Chad told him.

“You don’t know that,” Ryan snapped sharply, not missing a beat.

“Neither do you,” He answered calmly, which left them to stand there in some sort of stalemate. Chad truly appreciated Ryan’s concern, though he had absolutely no desire for Ryan to feel responsible for it.

His shoulder burned and ached, and he found himself wandering over to sit on one of the tables (despite knowing that would not alleviate his shoulder) with his legs stretched out in front of him, staring down towards the floor.

“Sorry,” He said uselessly, not really sure what part he was apologising for.

That simple apology appeared to seep away the remaining tension from Ryan’s shoulders and his expression softened as ‘Vagabond’ was put away and the usual Ryan took his place. 

“It’s not something you need to apologise for,” Ryan sighed remorsefully, “Sorry, I shouldn’t be taking my anger out on you.” He sat next to Chad on the table, leaving a few feet of space between them. Chad smiled seeing Ryan calm down.

“It’s fine, I get it. Occupational hazard: I constantly worry about everyone I know, thinking they might die tomorrow,” He said with a rueful smile, then suddenly became unsure of himself and worried he had jumped the gun to assume Ryan had been concerned about him. He tried to back-pedal a bit, “Uh, not that you, uh…” But ended up trailing off stupidly. 

“Hm?” Ryan prompted, not having made out his mutterings.

“Ah, nothing,” He was fast to assure.

Another silence lingered between them while the background noises of the other Fake AH members and video games continued to be heard from behind the door; it was comforting.

“So, you’ve been busy this month, huh?” Ryan enquired casually. 

Chad turned to him with a questioning expression, “Hm?” 

“I mean we haven’t seen each other in a while and you’re texts have been short, so I just assumed…” Ryan elaborated while mirroring Chad’s confused stare.

Chad had to stop himself from face palming at his own stupidity.

“Oh, right! Yeah, really busy with work and stuff, sorry,” He rambled out in a rush as he took interest in the wall opposite.

The pause that followed rang volumes.

“Wow, what an obvious lie,” Ryan told him in a deadpan sort of way, surprisingly not angry.

“What- Why-”

“Did something happen?” Ryan asked interestedly, not allowing room for Chad to deny it, “You’ve been off since the bar opening.”

At the mention of that night, Chad faltered for a moment.

“No, no, that was just a bad night, I’m fine, just busy as you said,” Chad replied, laughing lightly to show he was indeed ‘fine’.

“Sam told me you’ve been a bit strange since then too. Like you’re clearly bothered about something but won’t say,” Ryan continued, once again ignoring Chad’s attempts to argue the claims.

“No-” Chad started before cutting himself off, “You and Sam talk?” Surprised by the new information.

“In passing,” Ryan clarified offhandedly, “He seemed pretty worried.”

“He shouldn’t be, I’m fine,” Chad tried again, smiling but furrowing his brow to show he found the concern unnecessary.

He was actually panicking a bit. Ryan was stubborn and could be very ‘dedicated’ at getting people to talk; not in the same sense as when he’s trying to get out information from opposing crews or what have you, but still very tenacious. Chad wondered why Sam even though to mention that to Ryan; had he really been that transparent? 

“Can’t talk to me about it?” Ryan asked, clearly not believing Chad’s reassurances.

“There’s nothing to talk about,” Chad laughed.

Ryan looked to Chad unconvinced and said weightily, “Chad,” trying to coerce him into speaking.

Chad only tensed at the tone; his throat tightening making it uncomfortable to swallow. He couldn’t find any words and the silence that followed was deafening.

“How’s your shoulder?” Ryan suddenly asked, changing the subject.

Chad was dumbfounded and thankful for the mercy, and glanced over at Ryan, which turned out to be a mistake when he found his eyes meet Ryan’s. He looked away quickly, feeling his face heat up.

“Good. Healing nicely.”

_And hurts like a bitch._

“How painful is it?”

“Not very.”

“Don’t lie. It’s only been a week, right?”

“Then why ask?” Chad griped, but his smile gave him away. He was glad for the banter, it added a small feel of normalcy.

“How about the cut on your face?”

“Pretty good. I don’t need the bandage,” He said while touching the white patch lightly, “But it’s not a good thing for others to look at,” He explained with a small laugh.

It was then Chad felt a hand around his own, pulling it away from the wound, “Hey, don’t touch it,” Ryan gently scolded, “And fuck ‘others’.”

Chad had frozen from the contact and when he went to say something in response, wanting to disturb the soft atmosphere, words of nothing got stuck in his throat; his brain struggling for coherency. Even when Ryan’s fingers left his hand shortly after having been there, the sensation lingered. 

“Chad, seriously, are you okay?” Ryan asked, snapping Chad to attention. He had no idea what expression he’d been showing and it scared him to think he might have given himself away.

Purposefully, Chad exaggerated a groan, “Seriously, I’m fi-”

“Just tell me,” Ryan asserted impatiently, although his concern was evident as he tagged on a gentle plea, “Please.”

Chad was taken aback for a moment before he inwardly sighed in defeat. Ryan never pleaded in any type of form and Chad was troubled that he was the one that brought it about. He really wished he was better at disguising his feelings, though he guessed he was more of a ‘heart on sleeve’ kinda guy.

Chad was quiet as he tried to get his thoughts in order and calm his beating heart. He stood and took a couple paces away from Ryan, turned around to face him but took interest in the nearest wall instead. He made sure not to stand too close to the door, so Ryan had a clear escape route.

Laughing lightly he said, “You’re gonna laugh when you hear it,” while smiling crookedly.

“Try me,” Was all Ryan replied.

Another pause played out.

_This is going to suck._

After an internal battle of fight or flight, Chad eventually blurted out, “I like you.”

He hadn’t breathed as he said it; already going through how awkward their relationship was going to be now- how he’d ruined it and how much he’d miss Ryan. He tried to reassure himself that this was best though, that it would make things easier, and that he would be able to move on faster. Maybe it would have been better to cut it off at the start, as soon as he began feeling _something_ , but he hadn’t known it would go this far. And he’d been so happy being around and getting to know Ryan in the last 3-4 months that he’d grown careless. 

When there was no response he bit the bullet to clarify, “’Like’; not as in Michael and Gavin, but the way Jack likes Caiti.” He laughed under his breath at his childish description.

To be honest, he had imagined this scene in his head before: what would happen if he were to admit his feelings to Ryan. And with what he had come to know of the man he thought it might go something like this: he’d apologise, give a word of thanks maybe, then would say some awkward words of parting as he made his way to leave the room, and then they would gradually drift apart. That’s what Chad had prepared for.

What he hadn’t prepared for, however, was for Ryan’s expression to turn to one of doubtfulness and uncertainty, “Uh, what… Is this another bet?”

Chad blinked in surprise. He could understand why Ryan would think that with their last encounter at the bar, however, the disbelief in the other’s words disheartened him. 

“No,” Chad weakly laughed, “No bets, just me…” He shrugged with a sheepish look on his face. “I wouldn’t want to kiss for a prank again,” He added, his voice quieter than before.

_Yep, this hurts._

Chad debated with himself that if Ryan still didn’t believe him, maybe he could use that as a scapegoat and go along with it; however, Ryan didn’t respond and his expression became unreadable.

When he realised that Ryan wasn’t making any move to escape, Chad decided to leave first to flee the stifling air.

“Whelp… See ya,” He said half-heartedly, his voice still quiet while he strode over to the door, unable to look at Ryan as he did so.

Chad at least hoped that he had managed to conceal how hurt he felt and that Ryan would assume this was less of a ‘bid deal’ than it actually was for Chad.

He had only taken a step towards the door when he saw Ryan move in the corner of his eye and felt a hand grip securely around his arm. Chad turned to him while taking extra care to school his features. Ryan met his eyes straight on, like he was searching for something, and Chad thought he could see an expression akin to concern in his eyes.

“Chad,” Ryan’s voice was soft and there was even a little undertone of desperation in his inflection.

Instantly supposing Ryan’s tone had been one of guilt, Chad began to console him, “Ryan, it’s fine, it’s no-” 

Then Ryan’s hands were holding his face; palms gently resting over his cheeks while fingers curled around his upper jaw and neck, as he crowded Chad against the closest wall. Chad had been so utterly stunned and confounded that he simply let himself be corralled. He would have been more concerned in any other circumstance or with someone else, but it hadn’t seemed like a forceful or violent movement, rather the opposite; it seemed careful, even affectionate.

Before Chad could sputter out words of confusion, Ryan spoke first. 

“So, can I kiss you without there being an ulterior motive behind it?” He murmured.

All words diminished from Chad’s brain and he was left in a state of dumb shock, while his heart fought against his chest.

Eventually, he was able to choke out sounds that mimicked speech, “Wha- Why? What for?”

“Because I want to,” Ryan stated strongly, “I’ve wanted to for some time now.”

They were so close that Chad could feel Ryan’s breath on his face and he failed in his attempts to calm his heart or cool the heat that was spreading up his neck.

“Uh, sorry to echo you but if this _is_ a prank for you, you’re going way too far, man,” Chad warned, doubtful that his feelings could in any way be reciprocated.

“It’s not, I promise you,” Ryan urged, his voice low.

Ryan was so close now, leaving only a couple of inches between their noses, that it would be so easy for Chad to lean forward and connect their lips; and despite all his doubts and cynicisms, he couldn’t stop himself from doing just that.

He started slow, still nervous and unsure, and when their lips did finally meet for a third time, it mirrored how their previous ones had gone: soft and sweet. One of Ryan’s hands had slid into his hair, the other remained rested on his cheek; while Chad’s hands had finally moved from where they stationed at his sides to one holding onto Ryan’s upper arm as the other held a light grip on the chest of his t-shirt. 

The times they had kissed before had felt incredibly intimate despite not having reached out to one another; however, now that they were able to hold each other, nothing could compare. 

Ryan pushed further, encouraged by the reciprocation, causing Chad’s head to fall back against the wall behind him, though Ryan’s hand that still cradled his head protected it from the small impact. In that moment, Ryan took Chad’s bottom lip between his own coercing them open as they fell into desperate open-mouthed kisses, and Chad’s hand moved from Ryan’s shoulder to the back of his neck. They didn’t part until they eventually needed more air than their noses could provide.

When their lips did part, Ryan didn’t move away from Chad, but remained huddled around him as if he might suddenly disappear. Chad kept his head down a little, mesmerised by Ryan’s shoulder, as he tried to comprehend if what just happened had actually happened. They stayed like that for a little while, stood close together, Ryan gently stroking his thumb over Chad’s cheekbone and the bandage by his ear.

“I hate it,” Ryan suddenly announced regarding the injury, his thumb stopping over the bandage itself.

“It’ll fade,” Was all Chad could think to say and was embarrassed when it came out in a croak.

“Not that,” Ryan snorted, “You getting hurt,” He clarified.

“Oh,” Chad uttered dumbly as an overwhelming fluttering filled his stomach, before he found the courage to reflect the sentiment, “Well, ditto. But it’s not something we can control.”

All he received in response was a disapproving growl of acknowledgement, which made him chuckle under his breath.

Chad hadn’t fully grasped the situation, uncertainties clouding his mind, and ended up blurting out, “Are you sure this is okay?”

“ _Yes_ ,” Ryan insisted, exasperated by Chad’s persistent doubts, smiling warmly at him, “Well, I mean, _I_ really want this, but it takes two, so…” He let the silent question hang in the air and patiently waited for Chad to respond. 

Chad immediately picked up the implication and was quick to affirm it, “Of course I do- I was the one who said as much first, but I didn’t think you’d…” He trailed off.

“Me too; I didn’t think you would ever come to see me as anything more than your slightly deranged colleague,” He told Chad, chuckling before it dissolved when he continued, “Especially in the last month when you started pulling away.”

Chad’s stomach sank with guilt. 

“I’m sorry… I was kind of… stressing out about it,” He vaguely recounted, not wanting to elaborate on how he felt at that time.

However, Ryan seemed to be able to pick up on his tone and, while gently resting his head on Chad’s, murmured, “Nothing to stress about.”

“Apparently,” He smiled fondly, although, despite having said that, he was still battling with dubiety.

“Stop thinking,” Ryan said, somehow it coming out sounding both scolding and comforting, “I stressed out about it too,” He admitted sombrely, borrowing Chad’s vague, understated phrasing.

“Yeah?” Chad asked tentatively.

Ryan laughed ruefully under his breath, looking down between them, “No matter how much I enjoyed our hang-outs, it somehow became painful,” he confessed earnestly.

A surge of affection and regret ran through Chad at the thought that Ryan had been through the same kind of pain he’s experienced; and before he realised what he was doing, Chad had leant forward and kissed Ryan a second time that night. It was just as passionate as the first and Ryan reciprocated with equal gusto as his hands move to Chad’s waist and back (always being careful of his injured shoulder) to pull him closer. When Chad became aware of his actions, he quickly pulled away.

“I’m so sorry,” He apologised, both for the kiss and for any hurt Ryan might have felt because of him (although he was still having some trouble believing it).

“Don’t be,” Ryan said firmly.

Chad smiled appreciatively at the sandy-haired Fake and let himself happily relish in the moment, ignoring all doubts and bewildering disbelief that plagued him. Then, just as Ryan began leaving in again, the door a few feet away from them abruptly flew open.

“Hey, what are you two-”

Chad had instantly removed his hands from Ryan in expectation of the other jumping back and away from him, not wanting anyone to see them together. But he didn’t, Ryan didn’t move at all; if anything he pulled Chad closer to him.

“We’re busy, fuck off,” Ryan growled at the array of faces that were peering at them from the doorway, but the happy smile on his face gave him away.

From where he was huddled at the wall, Chad could just about see Geoff, Gavin, Michael and Sam’s faces that held a variation of expressions from stunned to smug.

“How did I not see this coming,” Geoff muttered in astonishment.

“ _Go_ ,” Ryan tried again.

The group eventually dispersed, laughing and shouting words of congratulations as they went, until it was only Gavin stood there, staring off into space.

Then, after an instant, the Englishman looked to Ryan and simply said, “If you took his name you’d be, ‘James Ryan James’.”

“Thanks, Gav,” Ryan dead-panned, then demanded, “Now leave.”

Gavin laughed as he left, closing the door behind him.

Ryan sighed.

“You can’t say they’re not supportive,” Chad offered, grinning as Ryan huffed a laugh.

When his attention returned to Chad he asked, “How’s your shoulder? I didn’t hurt it, did I?”

He hadn’t, but now that he’d mentioned it, Chad finally noticed how painfully his shoulder was burning; but he’d been too distracted to care until now.

“You didn’t, don’t worry, but I do think it’s about time I took some more pills…which are back in Sam’s car,” He admitted sheepishly, unhappy to ruin the moment (even though it had already been kind of ruined by their crew-mates).

“Alright, let’s go,” Ryan said taking a step away from Chad, Chad only mildly disappointed.

“You-” Chad had been about to protest that there was no need for Ryan to come along, but cut himself off. “Uh, thanks,” He grinned, winning a smile from Ryan in return.

And seemingly without even thinking about it, Ryan took Chad’s hand in his own as they made their way out of the room. Chad was both surprised and elated by the sweet gesture, not having expected Ryan to be comfortable enough to do something like that so soon in their…relationship? It would take a little bit of time for Chad to be fully convinced that this was the reality of things, but in spite of that he was going to try and let himself enjoy it.

“Sooo, are you going to tell me why you’re covered in ash?” Chad grinned as he dusted himself off, the soot having been transferred from Ryan’s clothes to his.

“Oh, God, so,” Ryan began excitedly, already practically cackling, and still holding tightly onto Chad’s hand.

END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Worried that I’ve stepped on my other fic’s toes with the ending’s theme of protectiveness etc. I’m really unoriginal it seems and I’m sorry if I sullied my other fic with this one, but I just wanted a quick thing to whip out, guess I got lazy. Tenses are everywhere, there's probably a load of stupid mistakes, and it's overall not great. Sorry! Thank you for reading though!

**Author's Note:**

> This sucks, I know. 
> 
> Not very proud of it; the word count is too big for how much that happens, some parts are rushed and the plot's kinda stupid. There might be a lot of mistakes too. It's just a silly thing I wanted to write based off the Extra Life kisses because they were sweet. This isn't going to be very in-depth or serious. Maybe some angst, but overall it's not gonna be that good. I hope you still find some enjoyment from it though.


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